The single, most influent anime that shook our loli foundation to the ground here at Animekon, providing us with some of the most rapeable huggable imouto-chans ever (not to mention countless surprise sex positions), is Ichigo Mashimaro. I will not delve into what makes this anime so mindblowingly hawt, but I will start off by saying that any new anime that surpasses Ichigo Mashimaro’s loliness, will likely become the universal standard by which our children, and our children’s children (all little girls, obviously) will measure the loliness of future animes in years to come.

With that in mind, when I first saw the preview trailers for Manabi Straight last week, the above question instinctively popped into my sick mind: could this be the new Ichigo Mashimaro? I naturally grabbed the first episode the moment a subbed version became available this week, and my first professional reaction after seeing it was: “gief moar surprise sex poisitions!!!11″. For the love of loli Jesus, this show has SO much potential, and yet it does so little to rape reap the benefit of its characters’ undeniable loliness.

And that’s a real shame, because all the imouto-chans in Manabi Straight deliver, in terms of pedoliciousness.

To get an even clearer picture of the situation, I took it upon myself to make a thorough comparison between the quantity - and quality - of all the surprise sex positions from the first episode of Manabi Straight, vs. the first episode of Ichigo Mashimaro. Unfortunately, in doing so, I nosebled all over my research notes, leaving me with nothing but the pictures to show for. Which I’m gladly presenting you below. (...)

 Continue reading 'Is Manabi Straight The New Ichigo Mashimaro?'...

Several anime sessions (and just as many near-death nosebleeding experiences) have kept me away from our beloved TV-kun in these early days of 2007. But now that I’m heki-heki, it’s time for a massive update! Uhmm… no, not OVER NINE THOUSAND, but close enough.

Heading this weekend’s orgy of new anime trailers is, as expected, the lascivious Ikkitousen Dragon Destiny trailer, revealing one or two mammalian protuberances… Not entirely safe for work, mind you.

Ikkitousen Dragon Destiny promo

I, myself, would rather go for something more refreshing though. Liek this. And this. And certainly this. And, let’s not forget, this. It’s a new ichigo-mashimaro’esque series spanking off this month in Japan, called Manabi Straight, and by the looks of it, Chi-chan is about to get some seriously underaged competition. Hmm-hmm, I’d hit them all, and then I’d make them play with my Wii. The loser-chan would naturally have to swallow!

In other trailing news, TVkon now also greets you with the 4th episode of Ayumayu Theater, promo trailers for Venus Versus Virus, Master of Epic, Himawari!! (the sequel), Saint October, Les Miserables, and the Romeo x Juliet trailer my pedo comrade mentioned last month. Loli Jesus dares you not to enjoy yerself!

Talking about more casual stuff, just before Comiket 71 started, more exactly on December 25, a cosplaying site launched out into the space, traveling faster than lighting to the planet of beautiful lolitas. RTV, the company that hosts this, offers space for users to create their own homepages and to fill them up with pictures of their little sisters. Cosplaying, of course. We look forward to it, and expect to see lots of Choco and Hazuki-chan costumes soon enough.

Welcome, my friends, to the land of globalization. Orwell’s predictions are getting more and more accurate with each passing day – the world will be soon split into three big countries: The Country of Imbeciles, consisting of about 80% of Earth’s population, The Country of Completely Sane and Normal People, and last, but certainly not least, The Country That Sticks With It’s God Damn Traditions. Now, I ask you, which country would you choose for a nice, quiet and peaceful existence? Why talking of globalization and foreign cultural imports? Because of freaking Ghibli, and their plan to “introduce works of old and new”. By that, they mean creating a new Ghibli Special Theater in Tokyo and start feeding the poor anime-devouring Japanese public with foreign, western animation. Even worse, Ghibli plans on getting a foreign director’s ass into Japan and start producing western style animation themselves.

While I certainly don’t have anything with American, Russian, French or Somalian animation, I DO hold a grudge against criss-cross animation. For example, take the latest American series delivered on Cartoon Network. While holding on to their old school tradition, they infused them with Japanese elements to the core. Moe, big eyes, cute little girls, so on and so forth. That, my friends, is crap. Animation without a history. And without a country. If Ghibli, one of the most successful studios, wants to criss-cross Japanese animation with the ideas of some homophobic, anti-ecchi director, then they are out of my favorite list. God damn it, by the time I’m gonna get to Japan, people there won’t be talking Japanese no more.

/annoyed

In every damn country on this entire sort-of globe, there exists one mighty and all-powerful, godly entity, called The Police. That, and Sting’s ex-band. Usually, The Police takes care of stuff involving groceries store thefts, donut eating contests (U.S.A. fat policemen only), cow raping or flower harassment. Recently, though, some guys from Japan’s National Police Agency woke up from their esoteric slumber and decided to investigate the influence that the internet, with all it’s not-entirely-sane content, has on children’s (healthy) development.

We all here know what the internet was created for. Two big bad things, porn and illegal fansubs. Well, it seems that these dudes have different opinions about this, reporting that godly stuff like manga, computer games or, why not, animation, have the casual effect of turning our precious little children into anti-social machines. While I do not totally disagree (take the case of MMOs, for example – playing World of Warcraft has the awfully high risk of making you wank on night elven chicks wallpapers), the generalization is typical for such organizations, organizations that start involving themselves in areas of expertise that are above the clouds and far away from them.

NPA’s sole target is to eradicate child pornography. In manga and animation. In other words, to suppress comics that deliver sexual situations with characters that seem less than 18 years old. In yet other words, to suppress god damn 90% of the existing manga and anime, because, we all know, each and every piece of Japanese animation has it’s twisted and perverted erotic situation, even cleverly disguised under the cover of, let’s say, alien-san trying to take over the world with his big bad robots piloted by hawt-looking imouto-alien-chans. Eh, well, do it if you must. NPA’s particular interest seems to be the bookstore websites where “pornography manga involving children” can be purchased. They seem to have found, browsing and flurping the internet, about 9000 adult manga items, from which 30% were “child pornography”.

Does this mean I won’t get a little sister for Christmas?

Once upon a time, in a far far away land (a land full of nice people, ramen and yukatas), a magazine called Oricon decided to ask it’s readers to take a quick poll. This majestic gesture of good will tried to gather all Japanese people around (men, women and young girls who give a darn about anime) and to ask them what anime character would they like to see in a spin-off. Simple as that. The results, more or less surprising, may be joy for some, and agony for others. Series like Death Note, Mobile Suit Gundam or Lupin the 3rd, seem to provide people with various and entertaining characters. With emphasis on seem. Anyway, enough chatter, here are the results, shamelessly copy-pasted from The Otaku:

Men’s results:
1. Char Aznable - Mobile Suit Gundam
2. L - Death Note
3. Krillin - Dragonball
4. Roronoa Zoro - One Piece
5. Usopp - One Piece
6. Colonel Roy Mustang - Fullmetal Alchemist
7. Fujiko Mine - Lupin The 3rd
8. Inspector Zenigata - Lupin The 3rd
9. Daisuke Jigen - Lupin The 3rd
10. Sumire Onda - Bayside Shakedown

Women’s results:
1. L - Death Note
2. Kaede Rukawa - Slam Dunk
3. Masumi Okuyama - Nodame Cantabile
4. Reira Serizawa - Nana
5. Shinichi Okazaki - Nana
6. Rui Hanazawa - Hana Yori Dango
7. Fujiko Mine - Lupin The 3rd
8. Goemon Ishikawa - Lupin The 3rd
9. Ryutaro Mine - Nodame Cantabile
10. Roronoa Zoro - One Piece

Overall results:
1. L - Death Note
2. Char Aznable - Mobile Suit Gundam
3. Kaede Rukawa - Slam Dunk
4. Roronoa Zoro - One Piece
5. Fujiko Mine - Lupin The 3rd
6. Krillin - Dragonball
7. Goemon Ishikawa - Lupin The 3rd
8. Masumi Okuyama - Nodame Cantabile
9. Shinichi Okazaki - Nana
10. Usopp - One Piece

Now who in their right mind wouldn’t want to see a spin-off starring Choco, a spin-off where she has three twin raging lesbian little sisters? Something must be really wrong with people.

As a Christmas gift, the official Japanese Haruhi “I really have issues” Suzumiya website got a little make up. You know, the usual stuff, server optimizations, more cats and, of course, more hiragana. The past weekend, an official presentation was held at Comiket 71, with some of them much sought after limited edition goodies being sold in the process. December 23rd was the moment all the horny Americans have been waiting for, hence the announcement that Kadokawa Pictures USA and Bandai Entertainment Inc. will jointly release the anime in North America. This news came at the official USA site www.asosbrigade.com, and, according to some folks at Bandai, the site was assaulted by tens of thousands visitors, with an exquisite orgasm of hundreds of thousands requests being generated to the webserver. Wow, that’s a lot. If my World of Warcraft server would suffer such molesting punishment from the fans, it would crash in an instance. And, of course, with me in an instance, huntin’ fer epixx. Following the said announcement, a Myspace page saw the light of the day, and in less than 24 hours, it ranked among the first 50 top viewed pages on Myspace. I would understand that, if it would host some proper Mikuru porn. But it doesn’t. WE NEED MOAR MIKURU PORN DAMN IT!

Finally, we get some spicy details regarding the highly anticipated Kiddy Grade sequel (or Kiddy Generation, as some sources suggest). First off, the show will deliver it’s undisputed moe to drooling guys everywhere with the launch of a Pilot DVD, scheduled for top sales at the end of March. In Japan, of course, as we, the underlings, will have to wait for the *cough* fansubbs *cough*. So, production details, right from the mouth of ANS:

Production details are as follows: Original Story: Gimik - Kadokawa Shoten Publishing, Direction, Storyboard, and Production: Keiji Goto, Supervision of Character Designs: Megumi Kadonosono, Composition and Scenario: Hidefumi Kimura, Mechanical Designs: Kanetake Ebikawa, Art: Studio Easter, Animation Production: Aslead, Project Producer: Atsushi Ito, Production Producer: Konori Hiramatsu. Official website: www.kiddygrade.com.

The story does not bold well for me though, because, as some say, two new main characters will replace the legendary (and totally cute) Éclair and Lumiere – Kufi-yu and Asuku-ru. The good part is that they are heroines. The bad part is that we don’t know their age just yet, but still, we can freely speculate.

Gankutsuou, the creepy-looking anime created by GONZO în 2004 (and directed by Mahiro Maeda), will finally recive it’s long awaited (by me) theatrical film version. I was actually wondering, these past few months (and after watching the show for like… the tenth time) when will this happen. Along with this production, which will be released "at some point in the future", a special, extra, and full of lolies manga will make its way into the desiring hands of readers everywhere (manga created by Maeda himself), being serialised this awful winter in the Kodansha'a Afternoon paper thinghy. I don't know about you, but this show looks really hard to get on stage. The artistic approach (more likely the mad/spooky approach) is unique. And Haydee is hawt.

From the land of „stuff gets animated”, comes Hayate No Gotoku!, cleverly translated into English as Hayate The Combat Butler. What’s up with that! Well, it seems that, well, it gets animated. Into a TV series, nonetheless. Though details about production, staff, number of young girls featured in the show and other very important issues are scarce at the moment, it seems that this anime is scheduled for broadcasting somewere this year. This may be happening because Viz Media has licensed the manga for a grand north-american release, and the first graphic novel volume already made it’s debut on November 7. Japan benefits from 7 volumes so far.

While you eagerly await the show’s premiere, fest your hormones with this pretty lady.